of course it would be this way. how perfect. did i know this all along? and why did i hide it behind a mask of fear, doubt, a wall separating me from myself?

never mind that. this ball in my navel, is where i should be. i can feel it lifting, spreading me, forcing me to inhale more and more deeply to as giving birth make room for its passage.this is the first blockage, standing between the navel and the heart. when i move this upward, and ultimately out of my body entirely, i will be in a position to see the rest of the universe clearly. i have been gazing at it through veils, most recently casting these veils aside one by one and i have finally arrived at the vantage point close enough to see through the remainder of the clouds. i am looking across a vast canyon, wide but shallow, and endless....as far as the eye can see, into the sky where it mingles with the pink clouds on the horizon and the yin and yang of the landscape become one.. mesas near and far, each one a stage for another superstar. and i think that i am standing on the land and all of the mesas are just stages and the land is the audience. i have been part of the audience. and now i am growing taller, this football-sized block is lifting, rising, dissolving as i look at it more intently now, dissolving like a kidney stone being blasted with SOUND i begin AUUUUUUUUUMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM
at the stone taking the sound deeply into my soul....and there is movement, vibrational movement. i am taller now and am rising above the audience. higher. the air is cooling, i feel currents rising and falling and curling around my waist as warm and cool dance the evening on. the sunset rays coral and peach are painting my face as i am the highest thing.
the highest thing.
i look down and see the earth below in shadow as i rise up into the rays of sun that angle to me and i see for the first time that the land from which i rose, is really another mesa. higher still, i begin to see an endless, fractal network of mesas, all stages. and from each stage a being rises,
the audience being left behind, to tend the fires of earth,
to feed its soil with their flesh,
to infuse it with intelligence,
to love the dirt from which they came, as they love the true spirit of themselves.
the true spirit of themselves lives on high, waiting patiently for them to reunite.
and so i rise to meet mine.